What will happen if you get what you want? How will you cope? Can't you set out, instead, to get something that you're not really so bothered about? That way, you can stay cool and calm and you avoid disappointment if, for any reason, your 'ideal' turns out to be less than perfect. Are you sure you want life to have an intense, rough, raw edge? Wouldn't you rather have safety and comfort? You can have more security or more excitement. Both together though, is not really very likely. But then, you know that!
If you want to lose weight, should you eat less or more? If you want to reduce stress, should you set a greater number of targets or a smaller one? If you want to feel less pressured, should you strive for higher standards or accept lower ones? Feel free to take on as much responsibility as you want. You are entitled to be ambitious and adventurous. But no matter how intense life becomes, don't imagine that the way to lead an easier life involves first making your situation more difficult. How much excitement do you want? How many intense emotional experiences do you feel you need? Do you have to get caught up in some great drama? Must you deal with problem after problem? Sorry to ask all these questions, but then questions themselves can be so very destabilising. As soon as we start to ask them, we begin to chip away at whatever is making us feel most stable and secure. You can't just ignore an unsatisfactory situation, but nor do you have to give it your full attention ri...
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