Once bitten, twice shy.' That's what they say. And they say it for a good reason. But what if, in being so shy of that second bite, we take our attention away from other sets of teeth? Problems don't always come from the places where we expect them to emerge. Indeed, often our assumptions distract us from the issues we ought to be paying closest attention to. You are keen to avoid a repeat of an old conflict. Yet in giving a situation such a wide berth, might you be inadvertently wandering straight into different trouble?
How much excitement do you want? How many intense emotional experiences do you feel you need? Do you have to get caught up in some great drama? Must you deal with problem after problem? Sorry to ask all these questions, but then questions themselves can be so very destabilising. As soon as we start to ask them, we begin to chip away at whatever is making us feel most stable and secure. You can't just ignore an unsatisfactory situation, but nor do you have to give it your full attention right now Imagine if one day we all wake up to find we are living in an ideal world. A new dawn, a new deal, a new Jerusalem (let's hope it's more peaceful than the old one). Will anything really be different? Well, it will be for you because, whilst your situation remains far from ideal, you are at the start of a big turning point in your emotional journey. You may have your doubts and reservations but you can put some faith in what's changing. It's not the start of a new and ide...
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