FORGIVE FOR BETTER RELATIONSHIPS

The better you can forgive  the better you can repair  quickly your relations with each other.First our relationship with Mother is birthed simultaneously with our entry into the world. We take our first breath of life, and display the initial dependent, human longing for protection and love in her presence. We are as one in the womb and on the birthing table. This woman, our mother. . . all that she is and is not. . . has given us life. Our connection with her in this instant and from this point forward carries with it tremendous psychological weight for our lifelong well-being. One may recall attachment, closeness, memories of the scent of Mother’s perfume, the feel of her skin, the sound of her voice singing in the kitchen, the solace of her rocking, holding and comforting, the intellectual stimulation and joy of being.
The other thing is that we talk to some not on daily basis,as we do with our family so chances of conflicts are much within family are there-there is hint within. Linda Mintle,Ph.D, marriage and family therapist and author of I LOVE MY MOTHER, but practical help to get the most out of your relationship- "think about how you feel in the relationship and what you can do to change" so Make the first move.

I find a book that discussed the conflicted feelings that their daughters have about these mothers, the frustrated love, and even sometimes the hatred. Because good girls aren’t supposed to hate their mothers, they don’t talk about these bad feelings. Motherhood is a sacred institution in most cultures and therefore is generally not discussed in a negative light. Some are suffering and experts wrote of the complexity of the mother-daughter connection, how it is rife with conflict and ambivalence, but some felt something different — a void, a lack of empathy and interest, and a lack of feeling loved.  Mothers try to parent girls and overly criticize them sometime, whereas daughters do not listen to them or do not have time for their mothers.

I AM NOT MAD,I JUST HATE YOU!- A NEW UNDERSTANDING OF MOTHER DAUGHTER RELATIONSHIP. The more I learned about maternal narcissism, the more my experience, my sadness, and my lack of memory made sense. This understanding was the key to my beginning to recover my own sense of identity, apart from my mother. I became more centered, taking up what I now call substantial space, no longer invisible (even to myself) and not having to make myself up as I go along.(Experiences of many girls) But without understanding each other we make mistakes and feel deep unworthiness,and
 we flail around, sabotage ourselves and our lives. Whatever your relationship is with your mother or daughter,chances of improvements are always there. Girls should understand that their mothers were brought up in different atmosphere and have their own wounds and hurts. Communicate well,be a good listener and have practical expectations and repair quickly the damage. When you can just console yourself-put yourself in her shoes as she is from different generation and  difficult relationships and issues. So instead of hurting  self and her just forgive which is not reconciliation,not pardoning  condoning or minimizing the impact, forgiveness is key for well-being and an individual act to strengthen the mutual bond.